Being a wedding planner sounds so glamorous, exciting and fairytale-like to anyone who isn’t an actual wedding planner. It’s always so funny to us because our careers are completely romanticized by Hollywood. Now, we love what we do, otherwise we wouldn’t be doing it, but being a planner isn’t as glitzy as everyone thinks. Here are 7 things you need to know about wedding planners.
We don’t sit in a room covered in white roses, drinking champagne, collecting cheques and eating hors d’oeuvres. Planning is hectic! Time-consuming outsourcing, lengthy phone calls to wedding vendors, constant emails, text messages and traveling are all involved. The movies don’t tell you much about the hard work and endless hours behind the scenes before the big day!
We hate being your therapist.
If you have hired a planner for your wedding, whether is full or month-of coordination, we are there to make it happen. We are not there to be your emotional sounding board because your wacky Aunt Hilda refuses to wear the dress you chose for her. We certainly want to help solve any problems that might interfere with the wedding day, but we don’t want to be involved in your family drama.
We need you to stick to your lock in dates.
Yes, of course we know this is one of the most important days of your life and you want it all to be as perfect as it can be, but changing your mind 50 times slows us down. When we give you a “lock in” date, which is the day the final decision is made about something, please stick to it. The more you change your mind, the less time there is before the day – and the more backtracking we have to do. Opportunities can be lost!
We do have lives outside of wedding planning.
Contrary to popular belief, we don’t spend our lives lying on a fluffy pile of tulle daydreaming about wedding cakes and floral arrangements. Many planners are married themselves and have families, friends and personal “to do” lists stuck on their refrigerators! We engage in leisure activities such as working out, painting, girls’ nights and we need our personal down time as well. If your planner tells you in advance what days/times s/he is not available, please respect it.
Keep in mind that you hired a planner because you don’t have the time to put into the planning because you have other areas of your life that demand attention, like work and family. How much sense does it make for you to start taking back the responsibilities you entrusted to us? We will never make a decision without running it by you, and we will always keep you informed. That is our job. When you try to take over, lines of communication get crossed between us and vendors – documents or emails can get lost in translation and this will create more problems. We work for you, and it’s still you wedding. Please don’t take over!
We are perfectionists and control freaks.
I can’t speak for any other planners, but for me personally, this is why being a planner is so great! We can be attentive to details, cater to everyone’s needs and ensure that everything is done in a timely, organized manner. However, there are limitations to our abilities. We can’t control things like the weather, accidents and screaming children. We also can’t make a relationship work (just putting that out there). So please don’t have those expectations. We are wedding planners, not miracle workers!
We appreciate being acknowledged.
So often, the wedding goes smoothly, everyone is happy and married and then certain agreements are forgotten. For example, you may have agreed to let your planner use pictures on a website or social media and forgotten to send them, or you may have agreed to write a testimonial and never done so. We don’t need you to make a huge announcement to all 200 of your guests, but if you can appreciate the work we’ve done by sticking to agreements or giving a tip or even a thank you card, it means a lot to us.
If you take these 7 things into consideration, not only will planning and working together be exceptionally smooth but you may just end up with a very good friend as well. We love what we do and want to see our clients happy in all respects.
by Ashley Victoria
Sourced from Ashley Victoria Productions
Featured Image: Jennifer Newberry Photography – Teresa and Mark